I've said it before, and I'll say it again: thank you, Internet, for being the stalker I have the inclination--but not the time--to be.

Substitue "Benedict Cumberbatch" with any of my fake boyfriends and you have a summary of my love life.



But I'm not complaining, especially since my current manlove fantasy involves BOTH of these piquant dishes:




That is all for now.

I may just marry this song.

Martin, I want you dipped in melted Easter bunny chocolate.

This year's batch of Ten Commandments captions! Enjoy ;)



The representatives from Zamunda have arrived.



The safe word is "Manischewitz."




Yenta has her work cut out for her.



Peter O'Toole and Omar Sharif checked in on FourSquare and texted me to meet them here, damnit!

This is one of those special times in a fangirl's life (or at least during the lifetime of the major crush period) when something cuts through everything like a Hanzo sword and makes her pee with delight. The besotted nature of the Cumbercrush has been indefinitely renewed. I want to drag him to Katrina's wedding.

Squee factor: 11

The Benedict Dances

He is some kind of sexy alien from Sexmoor or somewhereabouts.

Has it really been over a month since the onset of this latest Caitlin-brand bout of fangirlishness? It feels like just yesterday that I leapt onto this drunken bandwagon of Cumberbatch love. Having watched several of his past roles on Netflix and just now, his blond, homo-turn in Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, I find myself settling into the familiar confines of his singular face like an ass melding into a chair made of Silly Putty. It's comforting to look upon him, just as it's mind-bogglingly hormone gushing to look upon Daniel Craig.

Another Brit for the boyfriend fold. Still going strong (fed by the pharaoh's granaries' worth of unabashed hetero fanfic and "tweedslash"(my own coinage) in existence).

Sometimes I wonder if I have these infatuative fugues for the sake of having them, for the pure enjoyment innately tied with squeeing over something new. But it's not like I squee for just anything. The last time I squeed this hard was… well, whenever Prof Brian Cox grinned… okay, well, it's been about 9 months since I had my first Brian Cox squee, so we'll go with that anniversary. Anyway, no, I very clearly do not fall over for the sake of falling. I don't trip myself. I stumble upon black holes fairly blindly. And it's the most delicious spaghettification ever.

It's been full-on infatuation mode again. Since my birthday, I've been utterly besotted with the man bearing the most satisfying British name this anglophile has ever been privileged to utter: Benedict Cumberbatch. After nearly a full year had elapsed between my viewings of the first 20 minutes of the BBC series Sherlock and the last 70 minutes, I was both surprised and knocked out by the panther-like sexiness of this sharp-eyed creature. He possesses cheekbones to rival Cillian Murphy and talent as shiny as my own narcissism for adoring his gorgeous curly hair. That dark velvet Alan Rickman-esque voice sends shivers through my spine and girly parts, and the fact that he's going to be starring in movies for two of my absolute favorite geek franchises just slams the ovaries with desire on a daily basis. If I ever find out he's done any kind of Shakespeare, I'll have to stalk him for real.

Ben, sweetheart, where hast thou been all my life?

*UPDATE* He played Titania from MND. Oh, how I love a man in drag.
PS: Holy shite, he's really a redhead? Omg the narcissism never ends for me.

1) The Year of Chemistry!
a) read as much about chemistry as possible, including at least one legitimate textbook, some chemistry of cooking, and several about history.
b) Memorize the naturally-occuring elements of the Periodic Table by focussing on two symbols a week.

2) Read Shakespeare's history plays! And the crappy ones nobody alludes to ever! 13 left on your list… that's at least one a month.

3) Take snippets of video so you have at least 10 seconds a week, splice them altogether throughout the year for a 5-minute retrospective music video at the end of the year.

4) Edit the shite out of the novel.

That's about right.

Bright's Passage, Josh Ritter
As lyrical as I could expect from one of my absolute favorite singer/songwriters, this almost mythical tale of a man and his newborn son crossing dangerous country to escape fire and certain murder is haunting and heartbreaking. His horse speaks to him as an angel, goading him toward survival despite all his obstacles, challenging his faith and his resolve in the face of prophecy.

Nerd Do Well, Simon Pegg
An enormously entertaining autobio from one of the greatest ambassadors of nerdists on the planet. He uses his trademark charming candor to convey his geektastic path through life as a young boy growing into the man we know today, the chapters interspersed with scenes from a quick-witted and idealized sci-fi adventure novel so chock full of random geekery that only supreme nerds will truly enjoy.

Quantum Universe: Everything That Can Happen Does Happen, Brian Cox and Jeff Forshaw
After some Amazonian trickery, I managed to purchase this sucker well before it will be available in the States, and hell yeah it was worth it! The book alone is a beauty (wanna bet the American version won't be so pretty?) and the mathematical and logical challenge within its 241 pages forced me into mental acrobatics only matched by the last book this professorial duo churned out last time.

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson
After all the hoopla of the past few years, my mother's excitement, and the forthcoming movie starring Daniel Craig, I had to read this thing eventually, and I'll tell you what…. it deserves all the praise it gets.

Bonk, Mary Roach
After watching an episode of Curiosity about sex and getting all nostalgic over seeing Maggie Gyllenfrackenpuken film inside the MoSex, I got this at the library and read this sucker in three days. I love the unassuming ladybugs on the cover in the midst of making the beast with two backs, and the entire book was just as clever and frank about the subject matter, and though it does discuss very adult concerns and situations, it never felt offensive or pornographic (in case that's what you're thinking!). Extremely entertaining and enlightening.

Devil in the White City, Erik Larson
Connie graciously allowed me to borrow this one, after informing me that they were going to make a movie starring Leo DiCaprio. I enjoy a good historic novel, and this was an absolute gem. I felt transported to the dirty streets of late 19th century Chi-town and felt both the amazement at the achievement of the architects of the World's Fair and the rush of being privy to the dark twisted life of America's Jack the Ripper, HH Holmes. It'll be a hell of a movie, tell you what.

Orchid Fever, Eric Hansen
A series of essays on the strange and obsessive sub-sub culture of orchid breeders/conservationists/scientists. My favorite story was about the fox testicle orchid ice cream they make in Turkey that you have to eat with a knife and fork. Orchid collectors' lives are full of stories, dangers, and thrills… some of us more or less than others, of course.

Classic Feynman, RP Feynman/Ralph Leighton
I bought this 500-page amalgam of past Feynman anecdotal collections because it was dirt cheap as a hardback on Amazon and it had an audio CD included (supersquee!) of Richard telling his most famous stories about working at Los Alamos while designing the bomb in the 40s. The stories are as colorful and unexpected as they are insightful, philosophical (thought he hated philosophy!), and touching, and one section, all about his first wife and her losing battle with TB, had me break into tears. It's a great companion to any bio on the man, as it provides the reader with the sound of his voice (literally!)

Genius, James Gleick
Not for the faint of heart (meaning, holy shit, you best have read several books on the history of quantum physics beforehand, or none of the names will mean nearly as much to you), this bio is as comprehensive, personal, and intriguing as they come. Of course, the subject deserves nothing less. It was peculiar, but effective, for the author to peg Richard as the underdog in his own Nobel-Prize winning life. I think it did a fine job explaining why he was so compelling and why he was a true genius, full of rebellious originality and a tendency to check everyone's work to make sure he couldn't find a better way to solve a problem that was already solved.